progesterone and craziness

Hello all,
Well, I think I am going crazy! I am on oral progesterone and I think its really messing with me! I feel so much more irritable since I have been on it! Maybe its just pregnancy hormones in general, YUCK! What bums me out the most is I feel like my patience with Matthew has gotten shorter. Like tonight, I had just gotten him down when Jeff came home and screamed my name up the stairs, so much for that!! IT TOOK ME 2 hours to get him back to sleep. He never does that! In fact, I don't know of one day in his little life that he has done that! I was so annoyed! I don't like feeling like that, I have never felt like that!! Well, its only till 12 weeks! I can make it! I can do all things throught Christ who strengthens me! :) Besides that, not much is new !Matthew is so cute, when he isn't boycotting sleeping, what a blessing children are! I know this and have always done such a good job in just enjoying him. Because we never know what tommorrow will bring and I don't want to regret one moment with that little boy! I need to spend more concentrated time each day in the Word and in prayer! With Lent beginning tommorrow, I am going to make that my Lenten promise, to just soak up the Word of GOd daily and spend time talking with God!

Happy Ash Wednesday!

S

a tiny heartbeat

Well, my pregnancies never cease to amaze me at how truly powerful and awesome our God is! I had problems at the beginning of Matthew's pregnancy, with low progesterone and the actually thought Matthew would never be. That is mostly why we named him Matthew, gift from God. So, when I found out I was pregnant this time, I immediately had my blood drawn and again my progesterone was low. For those of you who are like, "What is progesterone for?" Well, it basically feeds the fetus until the placenta does, pretty essential. Actually this time, it was triple what is was with Matthew, but still low for science dependant Dr's out there. THen , yesterday I had some mild spotting and I had to get an ultrasound. I hate them!! They so stress me out! Jeff came with me, actually it was in his office building. The ultrasound tech was a guy, so nice and so comforting. I was asking him a million questions and he was like, " How do you know this much? I was like , "The joys of GOOGLE!" :) Anyways, we then saw our new little person with a strong little heartbeat!! I was so happy! I had been constantly praying to let GOd have it and not stress unneccesarily, which mostly worked! I have been able to share my testimony with how God brought us Matthew, despite what science or reason would have predicted, some people even cried when I told them about why we chose Matthew's name, all the honor and glory be God's! I have been so impressed with Jeff and where is faith is with all of this. He has said all along that everything would be fine and to just trust that, that we had been here before and it all worked out so why wouldn't it now?! Got to love that guy.
Matthew and I had fun in FL! He was so cute in the pool ,loved it! We took him to the ENT today and looks like that poor bubbie has to get tubes!! Hopefully it will help with the ear infections!


Later,
S

Giving it to GOD

Hello again,its me from FL! We're getting ready to go to dinner, but I was checking my email while grandma plays with Matthew. I was laying in the sun today, thinking about how our lives will change with the new baby and then started thinking, ok, maybe worrying a little. Worrying about what? Well,first and foremost that this child would be healthy, that we can squeeze some extra buck out of our already tight budget for the stuff it will need, that my pregnancy will be uneventful, that no harm would ever come to either Matthew or this child....I was listening to Coldplay's song , "FIX YOU" and am particularly touched by the lyrics, "Tears streaming, down your face,when you lose something you can not replace" and it makes me think of how sometimes I feel when I worry. That its time wasted and not putting faith into action, in fact not having faith at all. I continually pray, that I can give things to GOD and leave them there,not continuining to take them back again and again. That is my prayer for my life and my children's lives, that they Trust God wholly!

Sunny, cold?? Florida

Hello from Naples, Florida. It has been a very cold week thus far. We are just hanging out with my parents. Tommorrow is suppose to be warmer so hopefully we will get some sun !! Have a good, cold week!!

Good News

Well, the newest Simpson baby is on his or her way! Praise God! I went early this morning for another blood test and had to wait all day....ahhhh and at 3pm found out that my hcg doubled and my progesterone is up! I will be on oral progesterone until the end of the first trimester, but its all looking great right now. I do have to change doctors though, our insurance is not covering them anymore! I am so happy, even though I have to admit I am still really shocked! A new little guy or girl to love up!!


S

God's Will

Well, just when you think you have it all planned, God really shows you who is in control. I am pregnant, quite unexpectedly, but happily. Unfortunately, I am also having the same problems with progesterone and hcg like with Matthew's pregnancy. I was told by my last OB that Matthew was not a viable pregnancy due to my numbers early on. So, when I found out about this beautiful surprise, I called for a blood test. I was hoping and praying that I wouldn't have to go through this all again but today when the nurse called with the news, my heart sunk! But, only momentarily, when I realized that what was I thinking....I had my little beautiful Matthew, who for all "medical reasons" shouldn't be here!! I have to believe that God will sustain this pregnancy if that is HIS will. I am so grateful for all the growth I have had through BSF, church and our wonderful friends here, I really feel pretty peaceful about it all, no matter what the outcome. I know that HE is perfectly knitting together this little being and that we will have another little medical marvel on our hands. In addition to all these thoughts, I spent all day just rocking my little buddy, cuddling and playing with him and praying for God to make it all ok! I will let everyone know, whoever everyone is....its kind of weird never knowing who knows all your private business!

S

Work??

Well, I am contemplating going back to work. I am not sure what this will look like, but feel like its what we need to do to get ahead. I am praying that God would reveal to us what this will look like? Perhaps, taking care of a child here? Perhaps working outside the home, although putting Matthew into daycare isn't my first choice. Especially when I enjoy taking care of other people's kids. Matthew and I are heading to Florida to see my parents next Friday, that should be fun. I had the worse case of strep throat and was feeling so yucky, I haven't been that sick in a long time. I am feeling somewhat better although not completly 100% yet!

SUE

Hmmm

Hello, well Chicago was fine, but I so feel like I need to make more of an effort to build my relationships with the Christian women I have met at church. Its just so vital for a strong existence! I am so sick of watching what I say or feeling like I need to be tolerant. There are simply things that I am not willing to be tolerant of. Furthermore, there are things that I do when in the company of those who don't know Christ that I would never say or do around "christian" friends! I am so sick of living at double life!! I did that for too long and enough is enough! I am so greatful for our wonderful, loving ,forgiving LORD!! I am headed back to Chicago for some SOUTHERN LIVING AT HOME parties I have!!! I will miss Matthew! Jeff and his mom will take good care of him! I am so grateful for such a helpful husband! He is so great with his son! What a lucky little boy Matthew is!!

SUE

Peer pressure

Well, tommorrow I am going to Chicago for a girls weekend! Hopefully, the weather will hold up, as of right now they are predicting 6-8 inches of snow! Yuck, quite the contrary to the 45 plus days we've been having! It should be interesting since its the first girls weekend since my decision to stop drinking. Its funny, but I am getting a glimpse of how it must feel to have a dependancy on it, yuck! The reaction people have range from shock to disgust to confusion, lots of questions. I don't advertise it simply for the fact that its not my intention to draw attention to it, it is simply something God asked me to do! In my attempts to finally live a full, all Christ living and loving life, I am doing it. I just hope that I am able to use this weekend to have fun, share a little about what God is doing in my life and not have them walk away thinking, "Freak dosen't drink anymore." Not that they would ,they are all good women and most believe in God anyways! I am really hoping its a relaxing time for my friend Julie, whose dad died last week suddenly! Jeff is staying home with Matt, hopefully he doesn't fight him at bedtime and naptime like he does to me ! Will write after Chicago!

SUE

HURRY UP!

Well, the weather officially stinks here! I swear it looked like the middle of the night until about 9:00 am today!! Yuck! Anyways, I had several errands to do and Grandma Barb offered to watch little Matthew for me, so off I was, in the rain to do the mundane things that fill my little life! It was SO not a successful day! It started in an attempt to get gas, the pumps, yes ALL of them were broken, then I went to the Secretary of State only to find out that it was relocated, and when I finally found it, I didn't have all the things I needed to get Jeff a MI liscense plate! Yes, I know we have lived here for almost a year! :) Ask Jeff,it is his car:) I am way too responsible to not have updated registration! Yeah right, this is coming from a girl who had MI plates the first 3 years she lived in ILLINOIS! Oh well, Matthew had fun with Grandma, although he tried boycotting naps for her too! Little Stinker! I did make it to my "miracle worker" chiropractor who may have a soultion for Matt's chronic ear infections, HIS FORMULA! I am switching him to a lacto/milk free formula, so hopefully! That is all from the Simpson front! Stay dry!
S

Matthew, cute, fun, what a blessing

Well today Matthew most defintely woke up on the wrong side of the crib! After beginning his waking up session at 3am, he never really went back to sleep and decided not to nap until 12:30, slept for awhile and then woke up screaming! Fun, huh? At least he was good at church, they had him fully entertained. Today, our worship Pastor, who had really left in August to start a new church plant, but was still coming on occasional Sundays to lead worship, officially isn't coming back anymore, I am so sad ! I love listening to him lead us! He has such heart for the Lord and is such an inspiration to me! But, I am praying that the Lord leads someone to us! Exciting things are happening in our church, speaking of, I have to run, I am helping out with youth small group tonight and Matty Man needs a bath!

S

Death, grieving, yuck!

Hello, well the last week has been so hard and a real reality check. On Monday evening, my friend Julie, who lives in Ann Arbor, but grew up in Portage, called to say that her dad was sick and needed to be taken to the hospital and could I watch her little girl, Ava, who is a month younger than Matthew. I of course said sure and to make a long, very sad, sudden, tragic story short, on Wednesday afternoon he died. He was 53 years old! I am still in shock at it all, as I am sure my friend and her family are. It was so surreal to be holding little Ava and thinking "You have no idea how your little life has changed today." Its been a tough year in the grieving, area. In August, the assistant pastor at our church's 3 month old daughter, Ava Nicole, was killed by a boxfan falling into her crib. In September, family friends of ours (mom,dad, sister and brother in law) were killled by there own son! I still can't wrap my head around that. I know that its never God's plan for awful things like any of what happened to occur, but it makes my heart ache so to have to watch people suffer so! I am so grateful to have my faith in Jesus and know that those who believe in HIM go on to a better place where there is no death, no goodbyes! But, I have to admit, I am terrified of death, so when those around me experience it, I really internalize it and freak out . I think that is an area that I need to GIVE TO GOD, HE will sustain me, even in a really bad time!?? RIGHT, ?? I need to work on this ,so I can not only write it but believe it! OK, too much heavy stuff!

SUE

Happy Holidays

I was thinking today about the debate on whether to say Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays and it really started to annoy me, I mean why can't we just say Merry Christmas and go on about our day, I mean is it really offensive to those who don't celebrate XMas?? Also , I find people who don't want there kids to believe in Santa b/c its lying to their kids, annoying, I mean please! Don't get me wrong, I strongly believe that Santa should not be the focus of Christmas but lying to your kids, really! I sometimes think its hard to connect with other Christian women because sometimes I just want to be like, COME ON!! Be Real with me! I know you don't always think like your portraying yourself!! WEll, its looks like someone needed to vent!!

Hello

Well, after months of seeing others blogs, I thought I would try one. My name is Susan and I am married to Jeff and mom to Matthew who is 8 months old, tommorrow! I can hardly believe it ! I am going to attempt to make our blog interesting and try and post some Matty man pics!
Blessings-
S