I love you best

Matthew said something yesterday that just melted my heart. For about the last year and a half I say to him (and Caroline) quite often, " Of all the little boys/girls in the world, I love you best." We've noticed that he is developing a pretty funny sense of humor and so sometimes when I ask him, "Who loves you best?" He will reply,"Not you,daddy!" and run away giggling. Well yesterday after Jeff bathed him and got him ready for bed he asked to come down and give me one last huggie. He hugged me and then layed his head on me for a long time and then looked up at me with his big, soulful blue eyes and said, "I wuv you best of all the mommies in the world." I nearly broke down like a baby. All the tough days and moments vanished within that one sentence..PRICELESS!

In a moment

We have had a busy and fun filled Memorial Day weekend. On Saturday I got some much needed yard work done. Then at night we had Grandma Barb and Papa Bert over for dinner for her birthday. Matthew hadn't seen her in over a week and was overjoyed! Those two are pretty darn close! Yesterday we helped decorate our neighbor, Larry DeShazor's float for the Memorial Day Parade. Larry is running for State Rep and Jeff, Matthew and I we're part of his team in the parade. We left Caroline home with grandma which was a good thing b/c I am sure she never would have made it! Matthew loved throwing candy and saying "Hi" to everyone. It was a hot one out there but great excercise. Following the parade Larry and his wife hosted a bbq at their house. Matthew and Caroline both took long naps which allowed Jeff and I have to actually enjoy the bbq before having to chase and watch little ones.
Speaking of, my neighbor and good friend Jaime told me a story this morning that gave me shivers. Last night they we're in GR celebrating her brother's engagement at a pool party. To make a long story short, their youngest Makenna fell in the pool and plunged to the bottom. Thankfully her daddy saw this and bolted across the deck and jumped in..fully clothed mind you to save Makenna. She is fine but it just goes to show you how you can never be too careful with little ones around water. Makenna in all her 2.5 year old wisdom said to me today, "Sue, I drownded yesterday but daddy saved me." I gave her a big hug and kiss and gave her a big hug. I also reminded myself to being thankful to God for protecting her in that situation.
The rest of the week is pretty low key. Jeff and I are getting excited for our upcoming weekend to Chicago for our anniversary gift to ourselves. And, I can't forget that on Thursday our niece Jessica is graduating from high school!
S

Caroline's eyes

Caroline had a three month follow up apt today at the pediatric opthamologist in Grand Rapids. She was very cooperative and he was able to get an even better look at her eyes. It seems that she is even MORE farsighted than he even first suspected in January, which means a change in her lenses. I inquired whether or not she will ever need surgery and he said it depends on many factors. Right now, when she is wearing her glasses, her eye never turns. But, if this changes she would end up needing surgery. She will however most likely always have to wear glasses. The farsightedness will improve some as she grows but he made it seem that she was most likely genetically predisposed to having poor vision. The change in prescription wasn't cheap..and it seems that next time she will need new frames as well. Oh well, we need to have her seeing! As we were leaving, I noticed a little baby girl who by the looks of it had several medical issues, her head was misshapened and she had a tube down her nose. I am thankful that all we were there for was a lazy eye and in the grand scheme of things..not too big of a deal.
In other news, please keep my mom and my family in your prayers as she had some CT scanning done today as a follow up from last years discovery of the lung nodules and fatty growth on her liver. They are just keeping an eye on both to make sure they haven't changed since six months ago. We're hopefully that everything is fine, but waiting for test results is always yucky. Also, Jeff's stepdad was hospitalized yesterday for diziness and nausea. They kept him over night and apparently he is having a stress test today. All preliminary tests have come back fine. But, he has been under the weather for several weeks now so I am sure he and Barb would like to figure out what the heck is wrong!! We're just laying low this weekend. Maybe doing some yard work and having Barb over to celebrate her birthday. Enjoy your long weekend!
S

Caroline

I feel like I never talk much about Caroline on my blog. I suppose that is due to the fact that her crazy brother is monopolizing much of my thoughts! Caroline is now 19 months old and very independant! She likes to do everything herself! She has a very strong will and gets pretty angry if she dosen't get her way! She loves her big brother and her babies. She has grown attached to one baby in particular and a bunny. When we tell her its time for a sleep she grabs "baby" and "bun" and heads to the gate upstairs, as if she is saying, "Ok, I got my guys, lets roll." She is a real momma's girl and loves snuggling with mommy. She loves her two middle fingers on her right hand and she can often be found reading books and sucking away on her fingies! Her smile melts me and even when she is being a little hotdog she has this little look that makes you just say to yourself.."Your lucky your so cute missy!!"

In other news, we had our pictures taken over at Celery Flats this morning. They turned out really good. The kids were in rare form..crazy!! But, I think it was a fruitful shoot. Tonight is neighboorhood cards..fun! Here are some pics of Caroline over the past few weeks..I love the tantrum one!
S

Such a pretty face

All my life that has been an insult to me..usually because it followed the words, "If only you lost weight, you have such a pretty face!" like that was suppose to lessen the pain of basically being told, "Your fat!" Throughout this weight loss journey people have said a variety of things to me. But, last night at Bible study I ended up being just plain ticked off. We were finishing up the Pslams of Ascent study by Beth Moore. One of our discussion questions was,"When have you had to make a change?" My leader mentioned that I had gastric bypass, which several women didn't know. Now, one thing I have noticed is when someone finds this out they immediately look you up and down as if to say, "Hmm, really, I can't tell!" A few women were like, "I can't believe that, you weren't that heavy." "Its so hard to tell when someone is has such a pretty face, I just notice your eyes." I so badly wanted to be like, "Whatever people, I have lost near 100 pounds and gone down 10 sizes. Pretty face or not you should be able to tell and if you can't shut it!" Instead I just smiled and said nothing. It didn't make me feel bad, I have many "You look great!" comments to offset the rude ones it just sometimes makes me chuckle at the irony of the pretty face! Today as I walked the Celery Flats at a very fast clip I thought to myself.."Feeling this good is better than any compliment!" I love working out and having endless energy. I love looking in the mirror and feeling good. I love that I am almost minus 100 pounds! I love God for giving me this gift!
Happy Wednesday to you!
S

Mother's Day

Happy Mom's Day to any of you mommies out there! We've had a nice weekend. On Friday I made a spur of the moment decision to meet some friends at the casino in New Buffalo, which is about an hour away. I have been getting interesting reactions when I have told people this. I think its because since we go to a Wesleyan church and that is a big "no no" they think I have sinned or something. I didn't gamble, infact I really dislike gambling as it has destroyed several friends lives. But, I was meeting a friend who has been dealing with some tough issues with her son and I really felt like we needed some girl time. I watched her play three card poker and told her it was like watching algebra on a table, I just don't get poker. I also had to make a smart comment because at one point there was a lady at our table wearing oxygen and a man missing many of his teeth. I was thinking that perhaps when your on oxygen you may not want to be in a place filled with smokers and if your missing many teeth you may want to not spend your money on three card poker but on dental work instead..but I digress. I ended up spending the night there and got home early Saturday morning. We did yard work on Saturday and enjoyed the nice weather. Last night I had some girlfriends over for a girl's night. It was a mix of old and new friends which was nice. We talk about the usual stuff, kids, jobs, husbands..etc This morning we had nursery duty. After church we came home and fed the kids lunch and then when Caroline went down for a nap, Jeff did "the nice husband on mother's day thing "and took Matthew in the basement to play while I watched a movie and napped on the couch..it was glorious! We then headed to Kim and Wes's for a late lunch. The kids had fun running around and it wasn't too crazy for us adults to keep up with them! They were both so worn out that as I type this at 6:06 pm they are both sound asleep..HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ME!
S

Tagged

Tagged
4 Jobs I have had in my life:
1. camp counselor
2. domestic violence advocate
3. victim-witness assistant
4. domestic violence/sexual assault prevention educator

4 Movies I’ve Watched More Than Once:
1. Pride & Prejudice
2. Little Women
3. Anne of Green Gables
4. You've got Mail

4 Places I’ve Lived:
1. Cleveland,OH
2. Midland,MI
3. Chicago,IL
4. Portage, MI

4 TV Shows I Watch/Watched:
1. Jon and Kate plus 8
2. LOST
3. Brothers & Sisters
4. ER

4 Places I have Been:
1. Mexico
2. Florida
3. St. Lucia
4. Pittsburgh

4 People who email me regularly:
1. Jacquie
2. Mops moms
3.
4.

4 of my favorite foods:
1. stuffed artichokes
2. filet
3. my mom's homemade sauce and meatballs
4. chocolate

4 Places I Would Like to Visit:
1. Austria
2. England
3. North Carolina
4. Ozark Mountains

4 Things I am Looking Forward to in the Coming Year:
1. losing more weight:)
2. our annual family vacation to South Haven
3. Christmas
4. hopefully repainting my kitchen

4 Friends who I’m Tagging:
1. Carrie
2. JoEllen
3. Heather
4. I don't have anymore blogging people!

Run Matthew, run!

Hopefully one day Matthew's running skills will earn him big paychecks! Then, he can pay be back for all the anguish he is currently causing me! We have had two very naughty days from that little boy. He has taken to running to the top of our playset lately and screaming "NO!!" when I try and get him to come inside. It infuriates me to no end. He has also been terribly exhausted but won't lay down to go to sleep. Just when I think we're getting somewhere we have a week like this one is shaping up to be.
Again, thank goodness for Jeff. I seriously would die without him in my life! He is so instrumental to my sanity!
Ok, enough complaining. The rest of the week is pretty low key. This weekend is too. We may tackle the zoo in Battle Creek and on Mother's Day we're going to Jeff's sister for a bbq. We have nursery on Sunday......on Mother's day..no fair:)! Next Monday is my last Beth Moore Bible study. I am not enjoying this one as much as the last but the fellowship is still great. I hope to find something this summer to do in regards to that. I am thinking that I will go back to BSF in the fall though. I miss the format. I think I may have poached a few of my current attenders to come along too.!
Hope your having a fabulous week!
S
here is a picture of me and Jeff. We had no recent pictures so I have been taking more and more since I am not as repulsed by self portraits!
S

The lent child

It seems lately as I have posted about that too many little children are becoming angels. In this bloggerland you can, through reading others blogs then stumble across more and more sad stories such as Audrey Caroline's,Ethan Powell's and Noah Stevens. I use to have a book from college about learning to live again after the loss of a child. It had this amazing poem at the end that I have passed on to several people who have lost children. I just felt like sharing it. I think for those of us who still have our little miracles, it serves as a reminder of just how lucky we are and to embrace every moment with our children we are privledged to have. I know I especially struggle with this when I feel like I am going insane. But, how my heart would ache without my little bubie boy and girl. Here is the poem..
I again encourage you to check out Angie's blog at www.audreycaroline.blogspot.com, its an amazing blog that will FOREVER change you..

THE LENT CHILD

I'll lend you for a little time,
A child of mine He said,
For you to love while she lives,
and mourn when she is dead.

It may be six or seven years,
or twenty-two or three.
But will you till I call her back
take care of her for me?

She'll bring her charms to gladden you,
and shall her stay be brief,
You'll have her lovely memories
as solace for your grief.

I cannot promise she will stay,
since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn.

I've looked the wide world over
in my search for teachers true,
And from the throngs that crowd lifes lanes,
I have selected you.

Now will you give her all your love,
nor think the labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call
to take her back again?


I fancied that I heard them say,
Dear Lord, Thy will be done.
For all the joy thy child shall bring,
the risk of grief we'll run.

We'll shelter her with tenderness,
we'll love her while we may,
and for the happiness we've known,
will ever grateful stay.

But shall the angels call for her
much sooner than we planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes
and try to understand.

Who thinks like this?????

Ok people, its been awhile since I have allowed you all into the insanity that is my mind. The story starts with an update on my mom...she is seemingly fine. She has been offically off her meds for her dermatamytosis for almost a month now. She is feeling good with the exception of a few aches and pains that a nearly 60 year old would expect to have. So, yesterday she kept saying "Oww, oww my back is killing me" over and over while I spoke with her. She thought she pulled a muscle and it hurt when she breathed in. So where does my mind go.."Oh no what if she has lung cancer?" I seriously spent way too much time thinking this way. Finally I called my friend who is a PA and she assured me that unfortunately lung cancer usually doesn't have such obvious symptoms. Case study #2, Jeff went up north to his uncle's cabin with some college buddies. I asked him last night as we were laying in bed, " What if you die tommorrow?" to which he responded, humorously unphased by his psychotic wife, "That would be sad." to which I said, "Yeah, I would really miss you..don't forget to send me a sign that your ok." to which he said,"Ok, goodnight." As I drifted off into an obessive sleep I thought.."Your one strange bird!"
I think when I die I want a shoe to be on the top of my tombstone with this simple inscription.."Susan Simpson..she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop"
I really need to stop fearing and start living more!
I hope you all enjoy this randomness...
S

Olivia Grace

Here are some pictures of Olivia. I love the one of her and Sophia..she looks so proud to be a big sister!
S