Worry

Hello
I have to first say that during this pregnancy I have definetly found myself much more at peace in trusting God and not worrying constantly about the babies health. But, my friends good friend just found out that the little boy she is carrying has a birth defect, actually a few. Ever since that, I have found myself falling back into the pattern of last pregnancy, constantly Googling stats, birth defects, etc. Obsessing over my ultrasound pics for any problems. I don't want to be like that. The thing is, it doesn't matter, no matter what, this baby is ours and no matter what it comes out with, God has privledged us with this child. I have several people praying for me so the neurosis is subsiding gradually, but still I feel disappointed in myself for letting it get to me. I had another ultrasound on Monday because the little bambino wouldn't stay still long enough to have its heartbeat heard. It was amazing, moving all around, you could see its little hands, its head, legs, all there by the way. Even its little mouth. So much in awe of God in times like that, so amazing that of what He is capable of, just so amazing. We find out on June 5th what we are having. Can't wait. Oh, get this, one of our names for a girl is Caroline or Catherine. My sister, who has two children and is done, said that she would be mad if I named a girl either name, because they were her names. PLEASE!! That is so annoying, I guess she will just have to be mad!

S