Monday, July 30, 2007

All is well!

Caroline's eyes are fine!! Amen!! Amen! AMEN! Poor little baby had to have her eyes dialated and I totally had to pin her little arms and head down and he did have to do some searching but all looks fine ! I of course had several questions and he was pretty blatant and said" I am checking her retinas for retinablastoma" to which I said" I know, I googled it" He was very interested in what I found on the internet about it because he said alot of parents don't know about it and they really should be aware of the warning signs. The biggest one being, a white reflection in their eyes instead of red eye! So, you know I will be loving my red eye pics of my little girl!

This weekend while I pondered what I would do if it indeed was something serious. I felt like I was thinking alot about how I feel about God right now, in these moments of our lives. I completely believe and love Him but and I know this will sound bad, I don't trust Him. Now this isn't to say I don't trust His plan is is, but I don't think it ever makes sense. It seems like you have to wait on Him and his timing is too much to take sometimes. I want him to Fix things always. I always want people to be able to write ALL IS WELL. I want people to pray for things to happen and they magically become God's will. I want him to put a invisible barrier around those people whom I know have suffered enough and be guarenteed that no harm will come to them anymore. Its like lately I am thinking, "Come on God...enough already!!" then I feel really bad because the people who could be saying these things don't. They remain steadfast in their trust and praise of the Lord. I think if God was reading my blog he would read that last sentence and say only one word.."Exactly!"

I am so grateful that my sweet little girl's eyes are gine. I am so happy to have a little boy who is so full of energy but still can know mommy is getting mad and lay down and take a nap in his big boy bed! And, because of these things I can give back, do more, devote more time to Bible reading, praying and spreading the Word to those who don't know Him and the peace, that I felt even when I was doubting this weekend that only comes through those who know Him.

Please continue to pray for my mom, her muscles are still really bad, she is having a muscle biopsy this week and may have to go into the hospital for more vigorous treatments!



Holly said...

I'm glad to hear that her eyes are fine and that it's nothing serious!!!

Jamie & Heather said...

I'm glad to hear everything is fine!!

The internet sure can be a scary place sometimes! :-)

Will continue to pray for your mom.