Hello, well the last week has been so hard and a real reality check. On Monday evening, my friend Julie, who lives in Ann Arbor, but grew up in Portage, called to say that her dad was sick and needed to be taken to the hospital and could I watch her little girl, Ava, who is a month younger than Matthew. I of course said sure and to make a long, very sad, sudden, tragic story short, on Wednesday afternoon he died. He was 53 years old! I am still in shock at it all, as I am sure my friend and her family are. It was so surreal to be holding little Ava and thinking "You have no idea how your little life has changed today." Its been a tough year in the grieving, area. In August, the assistant pastor at our church's 3 month old daughter, Ava Nicole, was killed by a boxfan falling into her crib. In September, family friends of ours (mom,dad, sister and brother in law) were killled by there own son! I still can't wrap my head around that. I know that its never God's plan for awful things like any of what happened to occur, but it makes my heart ache so to have to watch people suffer so! I am so grateful to have my faith in Jesus and know that those who believe in HIM go on to a better place where there is no death, no goodbyes! But, I have to admit, I am terrified of death, so when those around me experience it, I really internalize it and freak out . I think that is an area that I need to GIVE TO GOD, HE will sustain me, even in a really bad time!?? RIGHT, ?? I need to work on this ,so I can not only write it but believe it! OK, too much heavy stuff!