2020 and 15 years and goodbye!

Happy New Year! I will join in the masses in lamenting about how crazy it seems that it is 2020! I started this blog fifteen years ago! Reading back on all of my memories with the kids, lessons learned, seasons of life weathered has been such a gift.
2019 was not the easiest year. I had a job I absolutely loathed and worked with some really horrible people. Fake and mean spirited and go behind your back and try and get you in trouble when you are at the Mayo clinic getting a pancreatic tumor investigated kind. I am so happy to say I have found two part-time jobs that I enjoy. I work as a palliative care MSW at a local hospital and as the MSW for a family practice office here in Rochester. I love the balance of both jobs.
My pancreas will continue to cause me issues in 2020 and for a while, in this decade I think. I had a pet scan a few weeks ago that confirmed I do have a small neuroendocrine tumor in the head of my pancreas. Before you freak out and think, "Oh my word, she has pancreatic cancer!" It isn't the same! Neuroendocrine tumors have a much better fate than their much better-known cousin of adenocarcinoma. Still, it is a cancerous lesion that I will have to deal with in the coming months if not years. Whether that means surgery or watchful waiting with scans every three months has yet to be determined. It has been stressful and I have realized that I appreciate an avoidant approach to health crises that affect me. In between scans and doctor appointments, it is very easy to just forget there is this pesky 1.6 cm lesion in me!
Despite the health issues we are all plugging away here in Oakland Twp. The kids continue to pine for Portage. I continue to be grateful for fresh starts and less stressful living. Making new friends here has continued to be difficult. I wish this was different for the kids but I don't mind as much. I am content with my life.
My word for 2020 is soften. I want to approach my life in a softer way. I can be harsh, critical, anxious and quick to anger. I don't appreciate this, and I am certain the kids and Jeff could do with less of it. I am still contemplating the best way to work on this.
I am not sure how many people have continued to check in to this space? But, I want to say thank you for taking the time to read here. I began this journey as a new mom to a six-month-old little boy. I leave as a mom of three teenage/tweenagers. I have been married for nearly seventeen years. I have gone from being a stay at home mom to a restless mom, to a licensed social worker. So many mistakes made but also so many lessons learned. God by my side and my Redeemer always!