How do you measure?

I have been a bit podcast crazy lately. Listening to stories, and tales helps pass the sometimes long commutes I am subjected to.  One of my favorites is "Modern Love". It is a story of love, loss and redemption(this is taken directly from the narrator's description). I have listened to so many Modern Love podcasts and many bring me to tears. Important note, I don't cry easily, if ever.
Lately, the Modern Love podcasts have me thinking about the story of Jeff and I. It is a great story. Well, it is a great story to me and well, I think to anyone who knows us. After considering all that has happened to us in recent years I have decided this story needs to be written in words.
 I met Jeff Simpson in the spring of 1995. I was a junior at Michigan State University, and my roommate Pam had a serious boyfriend, Pat who had a friend named Jeff who he thought I would like. They decided on a casual introduction one late Thursday night. I entered the family room of the musty home, and saw Jeff, splayed out on the couch watching Sports Center. This will always make me smile because 25 years later this is Jeff Simpson on any given night! Pam and Pat cordially introduced me to him and Jeff, in all of his gentlemaness mustered a "Hey" from the laying down position on the couch. I was not impressed. I remember leaving that evening and telling Pam and Pat, "Thanks, I think he is my future husband!" INSERT all the sarcasm. Fast forward two weeks when the group of guys Jeff lived with threw a party, add some keg style miller light and this girl was COMPLETELY smitten with one Jeff Simpson. Ask anyone, I had my fare share of crushes in my life up until now and I don't know what happened but I was SMITTEN. I quickly guzzled some miller lite and with liquid courage running through my veins, boldly (ok, mostly drunkedly I asked him out).  He said, "Sure" which is still a signature Jeff Simpson answer! I wish I could say we lived happily ever after. Long story short our date was at BW'3's during the final four. Worst idea ever. Jeff lives for sports. I have been married to the man for almost 16 years and I won't go near a bar during the final four with him. SO, you can imagine the date went badly. Epic bad.  Still, once the hangover wore off and the horrifying memory of me confessing my love and being thrown to the ground by one of the dogs who's leash I was holding faded, I couldn't get this guy out of my head and off my heart. I knew he was for me. I was relentless in my pursuit.  I rarely see anything though. But Jeff Simpson, I saw him through. For better or for worse, he would be mine!
Fast forward a few years and we found ourselves as young professionals in Chicago. The great thing about Jeff's reluctance in dating me was we became great friends. I don't regret a moment of getting know Jeff as buddy. Four years from the moment I met this boy, we became a couple. Soon after I would succumb to a serious depression . It was in these moments that all I saw in that boy at MSU years earlier came true. He was there for me though a very dark time. When most men would say, "Umm, nope, too much for me, he was steadfast." We dated for several years and then married. We hit a rocky patch about 10 years into our marriage. I think, if we are honest, many marriages hit a rough patch here. Marriage isn't very fun ten years in. Kids, jobs, diapers, mortgages, bills, bottles, diapers, etc. Marriage really sucks ten years in.  Thanks be to God we made it through a very rough couple of years and found our way back to our faith and to each other. Thank God because it seems only months after, on March 7, 2017 at 7:07a.m(but who is counting) I nearly lost this man. Jeff has two very rare blood clotting disorders and long story short he should't be here. But, God. He is here and we are still here. I often find myself thinking about life "before March 7,2017 and after". I mostly live each day in such gratitude for God sparing my beloved's life. I can not imagine living life, and raising kids without him. He is the BEST dad.  All of things that made me think he wasn't the best husband immediately faded in the prospect of losing him. But, the thing is, it isn't fair to hold Jeff to the standard of a "dead man." We are all guilty of making those who've died into saints. Jeff isn't a saint. He is human, just as I am. Also, he isn't dead and the longer he has continued to live, despite almost dying, the more I take his humaness for granted. Thankfully, I usually check myself and think, "Stop. Two is better than one." I have often said that I think Jeff's dad, who died when Jeff was only 11 whispered to God on 3/7/17 as he lay on that table having CPR done, "You can't take him, his wife can't handle the single mom gig." TRUE STORY ROGER SIMPSON, true story.
Life has continued to hand us some hard deals. Jeff nearly lost his job, we moved across the state, etc. But, at the end of the day, we are together. At the end of the day I get to do life with the boy who still loves to lay on the couch at the end of the day and watch Sports Center. This boy is now a man who truly has never known an enemy. He is the best dad, most patient and understanding husband and your lucky to call Jeff your friend. He isn't perfect but he is perfect for me and for our family. This Christmas we are saving for a new home in an expensive market. As I consider all my "gifts"  I count meeting a boy,on a couch, in East Lansing in 1995, one of the best I have received.