Lucky 13

 Tomorrow Jeff and I celebrate thirteen years of marriage. I thought to honor the occasion I would make a list of the 13 things I know about marriage thus far into our endeavor.

13. What idealistic idiots we were 13 years ago. Well, mainly me, I am sure Jeff, in his wisdom ,knew what he was getting himself into! I definitely had no idea how much work marriage can be.
12. Waiting a few years to have kids may have been the smartest thing we ever did. We were able to do many things that make being a married adult suck less now(like running kids around to a billion sporting events, helping with homework, and did I mention those kids expect three meals a day!??)
11. Being friends with your spouse is a good idea. Jeff and I were friends for almost five years before we tied the knot.  We lived separate lives but doing things together as friends has afforded us a bond that is pretty strong.
10. Like who you marry. If I weren't married to Jeff, I know I would love to be his pal. He is just a good, decent guy. The more I live in this world, the more I realize they are sadly hard to come by!
9. Laugh, good Lord, laugh. Some days you want to cry at the weight of it all. Adulting is so hard after all. I can't tell you how much a good laugh with Jeff cheers me up!
8. Making time for us. I am pretty decent about making date nights and couple nights a priority for us. Get away from those kids, stop talking about hockey, well, okay, if you can't stop talking about hockey, at least do it with some other adults! Go away for the weekend. Invest in the "we"!
7. Don't take your spouse for granted. The grass is never greener on the other side. In fact, that grass most certainly has hidden slugs! Be grateful for what you've been given and know that you can suck too. Don't even make giving up an option!
6. You don't wake up everyday thinking, "God, I just can't get enough of this man." Sadly, no. But, do I wake up every morning thinking, "Thank you God for blessing me with a partner like Jeff!" Yes! And I can say the days I don't, I make myself think of all the ways he blesses my life!
5. Surround yourself with like minded individuals. We have been focusing on this a lot lately and it has made such a positive impact in our marriage!
4. Forgive. Jeff is pretty much an expert at this. Grace, grace, grace and more grace.
3. Pray with and for each other. Every day.
2. Make God and your relationship with Him the focus of all you do. That, makes all the difference.
1. Finally, luck has nothing to do with it. Marriage, 13 years in looks like a lot of work, plenty of devotion, laughing everyday and plenty of grace thrown in for good measure.
I love you Jeff!

Grateful

I am overwhelmed tonight by my gratefulness. There are so many reasons that I am feeling grateful. I feel like for the first time in a long time that I have a handle on this little life of mine. I feel like my faith and relationship are where they need to be for the first time in forever. Changes I have made have stuck. Amen! Bad habits are being broken and remain broken. Broken relationships are being repaired where there needs to be healing and some breaks I am learning are best left alone.
Spring is coming..maybe this weekend? ! A new season and I am embracing it. I feel hopeful for the first time in a few years. I am realizing how much I was living for myself and not in the way my faith and my God have intended. I never want to go back to that kind of living. Uggh, I realize now how horrible it was. Life will never be perfect. Life is hard. In fact my heart breaks for all the suffering I see and the help I try my best to offer in my personal and work life. But, I have hope that if I stay on this path, those who need me, will get the best of me. I like the best of me. It feels so much better. I am grateful for the friends who have stuck with me and pray for me and with me. After all, hanging in there with me is no small feat. I am grateful for my husband whose love has never wavered in the thirteen years we've been married. Even when I have been quite unlovable. I am grateful for my kids who are always accepting of my apologies when I lose my crap over making toast(true story). I am grateful for my sister who always has wisdom and humor for me. I am grateful for our small group. Coming together every other week has much to do with the success I have had with getting myself and my faith back! I am grateful for my job that reminds every single day that this life is so precious and we never know what tomorrow will bring. Grateful, yes, that is me.