Tuesday, April 25, 2017

14 years

Tomorrow Jeff and I will be married for 14 years. Today we got in a huge fight because he couldn't find work gloves in the garage. He accused me of throwing them away, I accused him of never putting anything away in the RIGHT place. He had an attitude, I had an attitude. Then I called him an ass in front of his mom. Not my proudest moment.  You all know we've had our fair share of drama lately. Almost dying, kitchen floods, insurance hassles, contractors that are booked out for three months, three kids, two full time jobs, bills, life. You know who's the ass...LIFE!! It is sad that a mere six weeks out from nearly losing my husband, I found myself so frustrated at him that I am calling him names, and in front of his mother no less! Thank God there is always grace. Soon after the above incident occurred, and his mom had left, we talked through our incident and ended up hugging and laughing in the driveway. Fourteen years in, I love that we're always able to do that.  We talk things through. For a man of little words, I can eek them out of him pretty good these days. He never wants to admit wrong doing, and I love to point them out.
Years 12 and 13 were very hard for us as a couple. Major growing pains. I was telling someone today that is getting married in a few weeks that really someone should have another shower when you are married 15 years. I feel like these are the years that are really showing us what we are made of. If we don't invest in the important aspects that give a relationship the things they need to flourish, we could easily fall apart. We've learned our weaknesses and where we needed to grow both as individuals, and as a couple over the past two years. Thank God we figured many things out before all this crap happened because it just may have broken us. I knew these truths on our last anniversary.  This past year we've invested in ourselves and in our relationship with Christ. We've developed our faiths and good friendships. We've been blessed by our obedience. We know we have miles to go, and much more work to do to make sure our relationship continues  to be healthy and flourish in good times and in bad. We are committed to the work, and to each other. You know I love making lists. So, here goes my 14 reasons I love being married to Jeff.

14. His laid back attitude. Even when he's freaked out by huge medical bills and insurance deductibles, he still has a pretty good poker face.
13. He puts the kids to bed. Every night, without fail, he's helping them shower, tucking them in. I realized when he was sick how much I LOVE this!!
12. He knows what I need to recharge. See #13, I need lots of sleep and time alone to recharge. Jeff gets that and sacrifices his own needs to see mine our met.
11. He appreciates my feisty side. The other day I was asking him why he loves me, he admitted that he loves that I am feisty. Believe me, he saw plenty of this side when he was hospitalized.
10. He is a great listener. Work venting, people venting, always listening.
9. He has the same opinions as me on things that matter. I know many people marry people that don't have similar views but this is what works for us. We agree on things like religion, and most political issues.
8. We have fun. There is no one I'd rather hang out with than Jeff. I was so sad when I realized he couldn't come to Tennessee. We would have had such a good time together!
7. We usually don't sweat the small stuff. We both realize life is short and we try and live it to the fullest.
6. He holds me accountable. He is my ACCOUNTANT after all. I'd be a huge financial wreak without him!
5. His relationship with God is important to him. Jeff was recently baptized but he's been a believer for many years. I love that he wants to grow in his faith and that it is important that Christ is the foundation of our marriage. I have no doubt if this wasn't the case we would never have made it this far.
4. He is smart. Nothing sexier than a man who can do math! LOL!
3. He is an amazing father. Patient, loving, selfless, kind, committed. Our kids are lucky
2. He is a great friend. As I have stated before, you'd be hard pressed to find a person who doesn't like  him.
1. Life is hard, marriage is hard. After coming so close to losing my husband, I cherish this anniversary and every additional one that we are blessed to have. You never know what the day will bring. Cherish every moment. And, if you lose your temper and call your husband an ass, say your sorry and give him a hug. After all, we can never forget our good friend, Grace!

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