Tiny movements

Hello,
I wonder if anyone reads my blog, no one ever comments if they do??? Oh well, feel free to write if you want, I would love to know who reads it??!! Matthew is taking his nap, he has been doing something new lately when its time for naps, he puts his little hands under is head and curls up on my shoulder right by my heart. It melts me everytime. I feel like my baby will be gone soon, and when the new baby comes, I won't have as much time to snuggle him. I know that isn't true, that we will establish a new pattern. But, he only does it with me, like he knows he is safe and comfy with me and wants to cuddle. I could rock him forever and there are times when I just fall asleep with him and feel like the luckiest person in the world. I am thinking alot about our old youth Pastor whose daughter died last August and would have been one today. I just feel so bad for them and sometimes feel guilty for what I have. I wish there wasn't pain like that for people to endure. I know that its not God doing it and that we will see our loved ones that have gone on to Heaven one day and it will be a joyous reunion. But, I also can imagine the excrutiating pain of a loss like that. When I worked with people who lossed love ones in Chicago, it seemed like especially when you lose a child, you never are fully the same. You go on, you live life, you even get to a point where you enjoy aspects of it, but with or without God, your never the same. The grief of that must be hard too. A loss of all you once were. I pray for them constantly and hope they are lifted up by the prayers. It also makes me all that more grateful for the blessings that have been given to me. To never take it for granted,ever.
Ok, on a lighter note, I have been feeling the baby move, tiny little flutters, so cool. It makes it more real. I seriously sometimes forget I am pregnant. We find out in three weeks what we are having, can't wait!!

Later
S