Wednesday, February 08, 2006

God's Will

Well, just when you think you have it all planned, God really shows you who is in control. I am pregnant, quite unexpectedly, but happily. Unfortunately, I am also having the same problems with progesterone and hcg like with Matthew's pregnancy. I was told by my last OB that Matthew was not a viable pregnancy due to my numbers early on. So, when I found out about this beautiful surprise, I called for a blood test. I was hoping and praying that I wouldn't have to go through this all again but today when the nurse called with the news, my heart sunk! But, only momentarily, when I realized that what was I thinking....I had my little beautiful Matthew, who for all "medical reasons" shouldn't be here!! I have to believe that God will sustain this pregnancy if that is HIS will. I am so grateful for all the growth I have had through BSF, church and our wonderful friends here, I really feel pretty peaceful about it all, no matter what the outcome. I know that HE is perfectly knitting together this little being and that we will have another little medical marvel on our hands. In addition to all these thoughts, I spent all day just rocking my little buddy, cuddling and playing with him and praying for God to make it all ok! I will let everyone know, whoever everyone is....its kind of weird never knowing who knows all your private business!


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